Tuesday, November 19, 2013

The GREAT, The BAD and The UGLY!!!! or GOING PUBLIC in a VERY BIG WAY.

We knew full well when we agreed to be the feature couple for a New York Times Best Selling Author that we were sure to get some attention.


The book officially launched on November 5th, 2013.  I flew to Washington to meet up with the Docs from Surrogacy India (also featured in the book) and to be by Leslie's side at her big book launch party.  We had hoped to have the entire Wile clan attend but we just couldn't swing it.  So Gerry and I flipped a coin and...you guessed it, I WON!!!

 It was a very quick and busy 2 days, starting with our LIVE


 I was so nervous!!! But had a little bit of reassurance when Leslie (the Author) the 'Pro' told me after all the interviews and talks she does, she still gets nervous.  Her very first being LIVE on Good Morning America.  If she could do live TV then I could easily answer a few questions for the nations largest talk radio show and surely not sound like a bumbling idiot?!  All in all, I think I did pretty good for a complete rookie at all this media, spotlight stuff.






We next rushed back to Leslie's where she surprised us with our stylist extraordinaire who was there to greet us and pretty us girls for the evenings big event.
 


 While each of us prepared to be pampered we each took turns doing a phone interview with Susan Donaldson James for her online article for:


To date it has generated 169 comments from 2 separate websites.(Good Morning American Yahoo News)  I chose to remain low for the heated, hateful portions of the media and so I did not engaged in the battle.  However many of my online bloggers and fellow surrogacy followers quickly went to bat and fought the haters for me!  You all know who you are and I thank each of you from the bottom of my heart.  Let me just respond with a few comments that I felt were necessary to address.  I was misquoted on a couple of my comments (Ya I know BIG surprise!!!!)

So for the record....

1)   I did not start to try and have a family until after Gerry's vasectomy reversal. So NO I 'did not fail to become pregnant because my husband did not tell me about a vasectomy he had in a previous marriage.' Yes it came as a surprise, however we had not started 'trying to have a family' until after I found out. 

2)   If a 1/3000 woman who have a didelphus uterus is common, then I guess I am not so rare.  (wink)

3)  SurrogacyIndia does not ' deliver about 302 babies per year'.  They have had 302 births to date. 

4)   Gestational surrogacy is the ONLY form of surrogacy allowed in India.  Therefore my children were all conceived by my husbands frozen sperm he had donated from our very first cycle while IN India (Our first two trips to India we used my eggs and when time and age became a concern we then turned to using an egg donor, so yes indeed genetics were not a 'main' factor in why we chose surrogacy) and the eggs of an anonymous Muslim egg donor placed in a petrie dish, laser assisted hatching (and a bunch of other very complicated and amazing work done by the infamous Dr. Pai) that formed the embryo's that were then placed into our surrogate KT for Blaze. Then almost 2 years later to FB for the twins.  (two fresh cycles of eggs and frozen sperm on 2 different occasions into 2 extraordinary Indian woman who we did meet).  My name and my husbands (their biological father) is listed on the birth certificate.  My children are not 'bought and sold', nor in any way, shape, or form 'bargain basement kids.'

 5)   None of our surrogates were ever ' living in supervised housing. or more or less imprisoned.'  Yes they stayed at the clinic when they needed closer observation, however their entire pregnancy they stayed in their own homes with their husbands and children and family surrounding them.

 6)   "Why did we not just adopt????' Like people can ever 'just adopt.'  Do I really have to answer this over and over and over again!  We did look extensively into adoption and in the end we decided this was not the route for us. It had nothing to do with wanting our genetic/biological tie and everything with wanting a family.

And of course I saved the best for last...

7)   I am not a druggie!!!! I never lived in California nor was I pregnant in California.  I did not ever overdose on drugs or take any drugs the one and only time I was pregnant while living in Florida and 'so I cannot adopt children.'   The birth Mom we had been working with and were in the process of adopting her child just months before the birth overdosed while living and going to school in California.



Ok I'm done... and I don't plan to visit this again as I have no one to answer to except myself and my 3 very beautiful, 1/2 Indian/ 1/2 Caucasian very grounded, loving and wanted more then anything in this world by both of their parents. 

Here are a list of a few of the articles written about the book/our story:

A wonderful review from a very popular surrogacy blog by Chana Putnam. Who is also doing a GIVE AWAY of The Baby Chase.  So if you haven't already ordered a signed copy from us, then head on over to her blog for a chance to win.

 I think my favorite has to be this one....


If even in a movie, how friggin lucky would this girl be to have Channing Tatum as my husband AND have the absolutely gorgeous (and looks nothing at all even remotely like me) Scarlett Johansson portray me!  LOL


The next day in Washington after many photos and an impromptu question and answer session at the party The Docs and I headed out to see the Capital and the sights of Washington D.C. followed by a farewell supper with Leslie.  It was a fabulous few days and I felt so honored to be a part of Leslie's very special evening and even more touched at the wonderful way she portrayed our family in her book. She is an exceptionally talented writer and we truly couldn't have asked for anyone better and more special to publish our journey to having a family.


After leaving Washington the Docs followed me back to lovely sunny Arizona and finally got to see their amazing Godchildren for the first time in over 2 years.  It was a week filled with many laughs, special stories and memories from years past, tears, hugs and so many fun times not only here in Scottsdale, but Sedona, the Grand Canyon, and of course Las Vegas.  We have all made a promise to be sure to not make this our last family vacation together. We hope to be India bound again in 2 years for our very first ever 'family' non-medical/baby related vacation.











Friday, November 1, 2013

It's Time

 Publication day is just a few days away.  THE BABY CHASE will be available for purchase on November 5th.

 

 I will be heading to Washington D.C, home of the fabulous author Leslie Morgan Steiner for her celebration of the publication.  I will meet up with our amazing Docs of Surrogacy India making it an all around spectacular super mini vacation (minus my better halves).

New York Times Bestselling Author, Leslie Morgan Steiner

Here's what its all about...

 From the New York Times bestselling author of Crazy Love comes a riveting new narrative about surrogate pregnancy from both sides of the equation—the parents and the gestational carrier.

Once considered a desperate, even morally suspect option, surrogacy is now sweeping headlines, transforming the lives of celebrities like Sarah Jessica Parker, Nicole Kidman and Elton John, and changing the face of the American family. But how much do we really know about it? And is it really as easy and accessible – emotionally, financially, legally and physically – as magazines make it out to be? We often hear about successful outcomes, but little about the journey – about the precious hope that starts it all, the ups and downs of finding a surrogate, the heartache and obstacles, the risks and expenses at every step, or the unbelievable joy when years of determination pay off. In The Baby Chase, acclaimed writer Leslie Morgan Steiner weaves three stories together — of a nurse, a firefighter, and the Indian gestational carriers and doctors who helped them — to provide one intensely personal look at what makes surrogacy so controversial, fascinating, and in some cases, the only ray of hope for today's infertile parents-to-be.

Rhonda Wile and her husband Gerry struggled for years with infertility. With perseverance that shocked everyone around them, they tried every procedure and option available – unsuccessfully – until they finally decided to hire a surrogate. While surrogacy was being touted as a miracle for hopeful parents, for Rhonda and Gerry, it seemed an impossible and unaffordable dream. Until they came across the beaming smile of a beautiful Indian woman on the internet… and, within a few short months, embarked on a journey that would take them deep into the emerging world of Indian carriers, international medical tourism, and the global surrogacy community.

Moving, page-turning, and meticulously researched, this complex human story is paired with an examination of the issues—religious, legal, medical and emotional—that shapes surrogacy as a solution both imperfect and life-changing.

The book will be available for purchase in all major book stores and of course on-line at Amazon, etc., BUT we have decided by popular demand to sell personalized signed copies by us.  The out pouring of interest and support we have received has been astonishing. 

Here are the details for ordering from us:

$22.00 plus shipping for:

 a signed copy of THE BABY CHASE in hardcover and  a personalized bookmark.
 

 The proceeds made by the individual books we sell will go back to India for Blaze's surrogate KT and her family.  

Our story would not be possible without these beautiful and extraordinary women and so we felt it only fitting to give back to them.  Unfortunately we have been unable to locate the Twins surrogate even with a great deal of help from SI so we are unable to extend this gift to her as well. 

Reading our story through the eyes of such a talented author has been SO surreal.  We are honored and humbled at how beautifully Leslie has captured our story.  Reading it has been so emotional for me.  I feel as though i have been reliving all of the tremendous highs and crushing lows of our journey over the years in the last few months as I read each and every page of her book. 

Please email us at surrogacyjourney@yahoo.com to order your copy of The Baby Chase: How Surrogacy is Transforming the American Family.  We will ship all over the world for any of our out of country blog followers. Thanks for your continued support.

Tuesday, August 20, 2013

Guess Who's 2 ???

Yep, can you believe it the Twins turned two July 18th.  I am still in major denial that my itty bitty preemie babes are growing up.

2 years gone by

So tiny
2 years old
 Blaze is about to turn 4 in just one week and started Pre-K in a little more then a week ago....BUT I don't even want to go there!  Daddy picked the babies birthday to enroll big brother in school and Mommy was in a serious state of depression for a few days following!  I just want to stop time, but the universe isn't so cooperative.  I have told Blaze since he was old enough to understand that he 'will always be Mommy's baby.'  So it melts my heart when I remind him almost daily, "to stop getting bigger," that his invariable response is, "But Mommy don't worry, I'm still always your baby!" He even tries to use it to get out of trouble, "But Mommy I'm just your baby."  He amazes us every day with his wit and intelligence.  Someone told him the other day, that he was probably going to teach his teacher, he's so smart.  He is SO excited about this new milestone!  Mostly so he can, (in his own words) 'play with hot wheels, and make some new friends.'   I did however compromise with Daddy as he hasn't had the socialization of a classroom atmosphere, being cared for a home with his most favorite Nanny since he was 2 months old.  So, it's only 3 hours, 3 days a week. Come now did you really think I was going to let my first born get away that easily? Baby steps for me.  I figured it wouldn't be fair to throw him to the Kindergarten wolves next year without a little easing into it.  Who am I kidding...I'd go off the deep end if I sent him off to school every day, so,it's Mommy that needs the easing into it.  :). As we anticipated he is doing great and fits right in.  He's such a sweet kid and makes friends easily.  He loves his teacher and tells us all about, 'what he played,' and 'what he learned.' He sings us his songs and comes home with a huge smile and sneakers full of sand from their very own separate Kindergarten playground.

Feels just like yesterday...our 1st born
My baby is growing up
Such a big boy





 

 So moving on to my littlest 2. And yes, I do mean 'little' literally. We are saving a bundle on clothes that's forsure!  Believe it or not just a few weeks back I grabbed a 6-9 mth skirt to put on Dylan, only to have it promptly fall to her knees.  Grabbing the next one in the pile that seemed to match I put it on and it fit perfect.  Only to then look at the tag that seriously said, NB (new born).  Yes, my little girl is still so tiny.  Everything about her is small except her lungs.  Everyone knows when the Wile family enters The Disney Store as Dylan squeals with delight running from Minnie, to Princess's ("cess cess" as she likes to say) to Jake the pirate.  She knows them all and makes sure everyone else does too.
 
Daddy's little Rocker Chick.
Do you mind if I take this call?
The Birthday Princess
Yeh! For me???


No that's not a wig! 
Her other half is the complete opposite, taking it all in with his big eyes and low pitched, "Oooohhhh's".  It so amazing that twins can have such completely opposite personalities.  In fact,three siblings  can be SO different.  They are all unique in there own special way.  Dylan the excitable, little chatter box, that is, until a stranger approaches. Blaze, our charming Mr. Social Butterfly who makes most adults think he's much more mature then his 3 ("almost 4 on August 26th") years of age.  And last but certainly not least, Jett, who remains our sensitive, shy, loving boy with a smile that could melt the hardest of hearts.

Love my sweet boy
Howdy Partner
I LOVE the camera!

Little Stinker!


They all keep us on our toes.  One child is nothing when you add twins to the mix. I swear Blaze was a total poster child for having babies. Perfect in every way it seemed.  Don't get me wrong all 3 of my kiddo's are absolutely perfect (insert biased Mommy smirk). But two 2 year old's is a handful and then some.  They love to climb and get into just about everything they shouldn't.  I can't turn my back for a second to find them both standing on the kitchen table.  Darn they're fast, or maybe I'm just getting slow in my old age.  They certainly keep us young and on our toes.  We have to catch ourselves from mumbling, "Geee Blaze never did that!"  They even surprise him sometimes with their antics.  To which he will reply with a chuckle, "Oh they are so ridiculous!"  The 'terrible two's came on like a storm, starting just shy of their 2nd birthday!  Tantrums, stubbornness and the occasional swat and hair pull are all double the pleasure and of course big brother likes to not always feel left out and joins the party, just to put Mommy over the edge.  :)

Caught in the act!
 


Tell me again why we have 2 toddler beds?
Visiting Daddy at Work.

Other then me being in denial that my kiddos are all growing up and keeping us VERY busy we have had a pretty busy year thus far...I have/had a horribly painful and somewhat debilitating impinging herniated lumbar disc for about 2 months (not fun with 3 toddlers AND  12 hour RN shifts ). Gerry continues to be busy between work at the Fire Dept. and military reserve duties.  Blaze is counting the sleeps till Papa and Grandma come for the winter. We spent most of our savings on a new AC unit (thank you hot, hot, hot Arizona!)  A June outdoor family photo shoot in 105 degree heat Neyla (the furkid) and all.






 A very unexpected and deeply emotional trip home to Canada for me, to attend my beautiful sister-in-law's funeral who very suddenly passed away with an extremely aggressive form of cancer.

Cheryl Reycraft

Forever in our hearts.
Gerry's 5th Grand-baby and my step-grand baby  being born (finally a girl for Nick and Jessica).  A summer family vacation is planned to Disneyland (California) and Sea World (San Diego) for Blaze's birthday. Unfortunately we will be just 2 days short of attending our dear friends, Jon and Christy's Salute to Surrogacy Celebration in San Diego. They have done such an amazing job in putting together whats sure to be a grand celebration of all things surrogacy. We even got the privilege of a guest spot article in their magazine (to be given out at the conference).  The Baby Chase is still set for its November publication (and you can reserve your copy now on Amazon) Both of our amazing SI Docs (aka GodMama & GodPapa) have confirmed they will be finally coming to Arizona to visit in November after 5 and 1/2 years of coaxing. Its sure to be a jam packed November of vacationing with dear friends and possible media spots for the book in maybe Washington, New York or California.  We truly feel honored to be a part of all of this excitement!  Who would have thought our journey of a lifetime would become a novel?  We still love to take time to help other couples, whether it be via phone or email  interested in pursuing Surrogacy in India. Yep, things remain pretty status quo in our little blessed household.  ;)