Some days it just hits me like a ton of bricks. Yes, I know we have
known we are having twins for 6 months now, but some days it just really
sets in. Usually its when Blaze is deciding he is going to give Mommy a
run for her money and start with a 'terrible two' meltdown in the
freezer section of Fry's. My thoughts:
1. If its twin boys I am totally going to have to take up drinking.
2.
If its twin girls...I am SO screwed, I have NO idea how to take care of
a girl and besides we have NO PINK!!! Which ends up meaning big $$$$$
now and into their late teens.
3. What the heck was I thinking when we said lets have just ONE more??? Be careful what you wish for...
4. What will I do when all 3 decide to have a tantrum at the store, better yet how am I going to even take 3 to a store?
5. Takes me back to the title of this post, Holy Crap...we are HAVING TWINS!
At
this point I can't really think straight because my heart has started
racing and I am having palpitations and my breathing has become faster, I
feel a cold sweat come over me and then I have to sit down and pinch
myself to wake from my terrifying dream. After a few minutes my
thoughts then change too:
1. WOW...how lucky are we to
be blessed with not one but two more miracles from God. Please God
continue to let FB have a completely boring and uneventful pregnancy
that we have had up till now.
2. Some people would totally give their right arm to be in my shoes right now.
3. Its going to be okay. I have dreamed of being a Mom since I was a little girl and I CAN DO THIS!
4.
I have so much support from my fellow twin surro buddies to my amazing
neighbor and Grandma of twins, Aunt Winnie and now my 'Got Twins'
Facebook crew (Thanks Todd) who calm my panic attacks pretty much
daily. Who could be so lucky?
5. Everyone says if you
can make it through the first year the rest is truly a breeze. Heck one
year ain't nothing when we tried and waited for a family for more then 4
years. This should be a piece of cake...(Ya, right who am I
kidding!?!)
6. Blaze is going to be such an amazing big
brother and how wonderful for the 3 of our children to be able to share
not only the exact same genes, but a common bond of how they came to be
a part of our very special an unique family.
7. I
better get that mini-van I swore I would never buy very, very soon,
cause there is no fitting 3 car seats in the back on my H3 SUV. I can
totally be a cool soccer Mom!
8. We are instantly going
from a family of 3 to a family of 5! Do I even remember what I did
with all of my time just 2 short years ago...Nope and I totally don't
care! Wouldn't change one minute of this awesome journey!!!
And the list goes on...
Yes
I am scared to death that I am not going to be the very best Mother I
have always dreamed of being. Just the mere thought of trying to care
for 2 newborns and a toddler at the same time continues to baffle me. I
am about to get a crash course very shortly. But above all else, just
the fact that I can say that I AM a Mother...WOW! There truly is nothing
better in the entire universe then to hear your child call you
"Mommy." I am one of the lucky few to have been drug threw the
infertility trenches and come out the other side with the ultimate prize
in hand. Not one single day goes by that I don't look into my son's
big brown beautiful eyes and smile and say a silent prayer thanking God
and all the powers that be that brought him into my life, especially our
incredible Doctors at Surrogacy India, Dr.Yash and Dr.Sudhir (also
known as the best God Parents in the world!). Soon there will be 2 more
sets of eyes and I can't think of anyone more blessed then me.
So, here they are 26 weeks in all their glory:
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